This is a film that I’m sure many of you have already heard of, either by word of mouth or through social media. A few of my friends posted on Facebook and Twitter that they were going to watch it to see if it was really that bad, and one even gave 10 minute updates. Quite a lot of them didn’t make it to the end. If it wasn’t for this digital coverage, I doubt this film would have been so big and I certainly wouldn’t have seen it.
But there is little surprise that this made for TV movie has gained cult status around the world and has proved so popular that it even received a limited cinema run in America and a sequel is on its way. I should state that the filmmakers utilised its digital presence and fans chose the title for the sequel on Twitter, so we all have Sharknado: The Second One (2014) to look forward to next year.
Before I delve into my review, I would like to define what cult is to me: a group of fans who enjoy and are dedicated to a specific area of artistic culture through shared experience in this case a cheaply made B movie horror movie. The term can only be applied to a product in its infancy, as the more popular it becomes it eventually will become mainstream.
We have cult films from the likes of Roger Corman and Troma, old video nasties and modern homages such as Snakes on a Plane (2006), which had such a huge online fan base that they altered the film to add in more swearing and violence whilst still in production. However this is not the only aquatic horror B movie in recent memory. Deep Blue Sea (1999) was an entertaining action flick, whilst Piranha (2010) and Piranha 3DD (2012) were just simple no brainer’ fun.
Either way I am a fan of cinema as a whole, which includes no brainer’ trash. I wanted to watch Sharknado to see if it is as horrible as I’ve heard and to be honest, I couldn’t wait to experience it for all its glory! As this film doesn’t take itself seriously, I feel that I shouldn’t take this review too seriously either; however I am asking why I am putting myself through this experience.
The film opens with a shoal of bad CGI sharks swimming away from a tornado. Cut to a fishing ship specialising in capturing sharks for their fins and throwing the rest of the carcasses into the sea. Don’t worry; they use stock footage of the fins being cut off. Some random Asian businessman and a captain with a frankly awful accent are trying to make a deal, when waves crash over the ship bringing sharks that eat the crew. This does set the tone of just how silly the rest of the film is and the ship quickly gets sucked into the tornado. This set up is however relatively pointless to the rest of the film.
Cut to a beach in LA where retired surfers Fin (yes, he’s called Fin) Shepard (Ziering) and stereotypical Aussie Baz Hogan (Simmons) are out surfing when there’s a mass shark attack on the beach. Cue cheese, bad acting and as much fake blood as $10 can afford. They survive and head to Fin’s bar, joining the hot bikini girl Nova (Scerbo) and retired surfer / “comic relief George (John Heard). The ocean rises, they grab guns and a bar stool, escape flooded streets infested with sharks to Fin’s wife April (Reid) and their children, then head to the city, only for shark infested tornados to hit and only they can save the day!
Now I don’t consider any of what I write here a spoiler. For one the title is a dead giveaway and the film’s trailer pretty much gives away the whole film, even how they plan to throw bombs into the Sharknado to stop it. Well at least they try to explain some sort of scientific theory behind it, although it’s utterly flawed. Sadly this feels like a cheap Roland Emmerich flick. As such this film is incredibly predictable and not an enjoyable watch as it’s filled with so many problems.
For a start the effects look terrible and are often reused over and over again, just like in Superman 4: The Quest for Peace (1987). I have an issue with CGI monsters as they don’t look scary, but these sharks look absolutely harmless! Oh yeah, the sharks roar.
The use of gore could have been a beneficial factor to this film, but its use was simply dull and cheap. Even during the films finale we would have had a few laughs if it was more OTT.
Next we have the shocking use of editing and continuity. During the opening credits we have intercutting shots of a rough sea with high waves, and Fin and Baz walking down the beach with a calm ocean behind them. This is a result of badly placed stock footage and documentary material which is plentiful and distracting. Granted, the stock footage in the film’s opening was at least similar in look to the boat, but as the film progresses the use isn’t even funny. One of my favourite examples is a shot of a shark with two fish next to it swimming in a vast ocean towards the camera, and this cutaway is used first in an ocean setting and then secondly in a small swimming pool.
Whenever the characters are in a car they are obviously stationary with a bad projection behind the vehicle. At one point I thought it was strange that with an impending tornado we didn’t see the emergency services aiding the public and I thought that I hadn’t seen any police yet. Lo and behold some terrible use of mixing stock footage of cops, the cast in the stationary car followed by an awful CGI shot of the car driving through one of the stock footage shots of a road block, then cut to various shots of police chases throughout various rural and urban areas and even a tunnel. My favourite however has to be when a helicopter is crash landing in the city and then we see a shot from within a helicopter landing in a field.
The audio is pretty terrible too. In one scene the main characters have a hilarious four way conversation where we don’t see them speak, just hear badly re-recorded dialogue over reaction shots.
Then we have the acting, which is just god-awful with the acceptation of Cassie Scerbo, who manages to play her role quite well and you can tell she had fun with a shotgun. The accents are awful, there’s no convincing emotion from the crisis or other characters demises, and when it is revealed that Baz is the father to Fin’s child or when Fin delays their escape to rescue a bus full of school kids you get as much of a reaction from a clothes peg.
And then there is Tara Reid. She was acceptable in the first two America Pie films but can’t act to save her life and I wonder how much she got paid for this. Bear in mind she was on celebrity Big Brother, so probably not much. There is also the fact that she has 2 children in this film, her teenage daughter who she must have been pregnant with when she was 15, and her son who looks like he’s in his 30’s.
We all like corny one liners and cheese, but lines like “LA is drowning, “It’s time to leave Kansas mate and “Sharks don’t like vegemite fall flat. One giggle however was when Nova reveals the story behind her mysterious scar to Fin’s son, which as you guessed involved sharks. “They took my grandfather, that’s why I really hate sharks. to which he replies: “Now I really hate sharks too. In an awful film this is spot on timing and made me giggle.
Now onto the logic. I enjoy high concept and implausible films where I can just turn my brain off and enjoy the ride but this film just didn’t make any sense and this was a distracting factor. Granted with a film called Sharknado you can give a certain amount of leeway, but why would someone who has a mysterious scar on their leg that they don’t want to talk aboutm work in a place where the uniform is a bikini? How is Fin’s car managing to drive in two feet of water? A house is flooded on the ground floor but the drive outside isn’t. If you pour a can of petrol into a swimming pool and set it alight then the whole thing explodes. A Sharknado rips apart an airport sucking up or destroying all the planes, but a helicopter remains untouched. This film transcends physics and reason, but had me wondering if I was missing the point of it all? This should be a silly and entertaining watch but its elements are so shockingly distracting that it’s just not fun. Imagine Garth Marenghi’s Darkplace (2004) but unintentionally bad and you get a good idea of what to expect.
This film makes me depressed at the current film industry for allowing stuff like this to be made. Who green lights these films and how can I get a job there?! How about a film where octopuses are underground and their tentacles come up through toilets and man hole covers to get people? Or flamingos that are carnivorous – Oh wait that was in The Croods (2013).
I know it’s only a TV movie but the Syfy channel has made some truly excellent stuff like Battlestar Galactica (2004 – 2009) and I wonder why this film was a hit and various other Syfy channel films don’t get much exposure?
However it gives me hope that anyone can make a movie and I hope this is what the film makers wanted: a movie with a global cult following.
I have read a few reviews of this film and they state that this film best watched as a group experience. The majority are written with an overbearing use of sarcasm but one pointed out that you can’t view a B movie with the same eyes as a blockbuster. As such you experience, appreciate and enjoy things in a different light and can credit it for what it’s worth.
A few saving graces can be found in the special features. The title menu doesn’t have any spoilers and plays a Ramones like song about the Sharknado, complete with cheesy guitar riffs. We have the spoiler filled trailer and a gag reel which is worth a watch.
The generic behind-the-scenes has Tara Reid you know, talks about, you know, acting without sharks, you know, before they put the sharks in’. The film’s director praises it and states that they wanted it to be a good film, however they failed. We have a bit on the special effects and we discover that it was shot in 18 days.
I wonder if Mystery Science Theatre is still made by Syfy? If so then why isn’t a commentary on this disk as a special feature? It would be awesome and compulsory for your enjoyment of the film.
Overall Verdict: This film really was awful. It could have been tweaked to have been funnier, but there is frankly too much to list that is awful about it. I can definitely see how this film has gained its cult following for being bad and there is always an audience for anything put out there. I should not take this film seriously as the subject matter is ridiculous, but not in a good way. Ultimately it’s a very distracting bad film which is a great lesson on how not to make your movie rubbish.
Reviewer: George Elcombe