Christ, I’m old. Ok, I’m not that old at all, 26 this week in fact, a number that would make most people even in their 30s weep a tiny tear of nostalgia. I’m in the prime of my life, but there’s nothing to make you feel like a wizened old git, waiting for the cold hand of death to appear, quite like watching a kid’s action movie.
The Sorcerer’s Apprentice is a tale just begging to be given a glossy makeover. Geeky awkward science nerd finds out he has magical powers and proceeds to use them to fight evil, accomplish menial tasks in unfeasibly awesome ways and obtain a girlfriend several kilometres out of his league. Shallow and slightly contrived? Oh yes. Does its target audience care? Hell no.
In the titular role we have Jay Baruchel, famed previously for out-and-out adult comedies like Knocked Up and Tropic Thunder, but perfectly cast here as endearing idiot Dave. The character’s Stan-Laurel-meets-Woody-Allen “Aaaawww jeez” shtick isn’t exactly a stretch for Baruchel, but the relative newcomer is carving out an impressive career for himself by being impossible to hate. The same tricks that turned this year’s She’s Out Of My League from mediocre rom-com to surprisingly good rom-com work here too and mean that the film doesn’t get dragged down by a smug, fast-talking lead.
The big draw, however, is always going to be good ol’ Nick Cage. Fresh of the slightly strange “Was it great? Was it awful?” Bad Lieutenant, he’s on slightly more stable ground as the ageless wizard Balthazar, Dave’s mentor. Again, nothing about the character makes for anything other than a mild exertion of Cages acting muscles but, unlike previous effects-heavy flops such as Ghost Rider, Next and Knowing, in which he seemed fairly blasé about playing second fiddle to the CGI, here, under good direction from John Turtletaub, he succeeds in bringing in a human element, which creates a stable framework from which the more hyperactive elements can flow freely.
As youd expect from Disney and Bruckheimer, the CGI behind The Sorcerers Apprentice is marvellous, a pleasing combination of epic combat and less predictable moments, my particular highlight being a magic tinged car chase across Manhattan. Unfortunately, thats really all there is to this film. Turtletaub glosses up the production to a beautiful shine, but forgets to put anything substantial within the piece. Messages about being a teen outcast and falling in love young are present, but mostly drowned out by the visual cacophony of the films magical focus.
So, back to my initial point then. I was all set to give this film a bit of a kicking. Its a shallow, cliché-ridden action comedy straight out of the Hollywood cookie-cutter. The special effect sequences are excellent, but theyre devoid of any kind of soul or memorable spark. Then after the end credits rolled, I walked out into the cinema foyer and saw a bunch of kids whod sat a couple of rows behind me, leaping around, making whooshing exploding noises and pretending to throw plasma bolts at each other and I realised, that if a film could provoke that, Id rather missed the point.
Now dont misunderstand me, Im not saying Im wrong. Im a critic, and therefore am never wrong, not ever. I am however, a jaded, slightly cynical empty shell of a man who wouldnt recognise the simple joy of youth if it struck him sharply in the face with a shovel. The Sorcerers Apprentice still has all those terrible qualities I mentioned previously, but all your average 10 year old needs is an engaging storyline and some epic CG, both of which this movie has in spades.
Overall Verdict: For the young, undemanding viewer, a treat of great special effects and simple empathetic characters. Everyone else however, will struggle to find much worthwhile in this very much by-the-numbers action comedy.
Reviewer: Alex Hall